Category: Dating and Relationships
How to turn friends with benefits into a long term relationship. So, i've been talking to this girl for almost a year now. Were just friends and I'm starting to see her more than that. How do I make a move on her? She only sees me as a friend. Were physically intimate, but i don't know how to switch from being her friend to letting her know that i want to be more than friends?
Uhhhhh! Why don't you just tell her you want her? And if she says that she doesn't want you in that way, tell her that that's okay with you, but only if it really is. And if you want to remain friends, tell her not to let this get in the way of your friendship.
hmmm. here we call that as a pillow's secret. or a pillow mandharam.
but since I dono the perfect theory of friends with benefits, make sure that she's benefited only by you prior to talking about long time relativity. or, at least in future.
Just my opinion.
Raaj.
I'd say the best, and simplest solution, is just to be honest with her about your feelings, and see how she responds. If you've been friends for that long, surely you've learned to communicate with each other. Now is the time to use that communication. If you want a relationship with her, you're going to have to start being open with your feelings anyway.
Call her and tell her. Lmaoo
Ah, the tact is not to go up to her and outright say it, it might startle her. Give her hints each getting more obvious and after a good amount of time when you feel up to it, tell what you think of her.
If he and the girl are already physically intimate, I don't think he needs to hint anything. Telling her he wants to be more than friends probably won't be a huge shock if they already have such a relationship.
In what way do you think you see her as more than a friend? what brought this on? do you get jealous when she talks about being attracted to other men? or do you specifically want to be romantic with her? sometimes, friends with benifit type situations result in the whole "I want to be the only one you fuck but I don't want your love" type deal. Anyway, if you're certain that she only views you as a friend and doesn't want anything more, I'd suggest stopping the sex because it'll only hurt you more. If you're uncertain about her take, you definitely need to ask her.
If you already spent too much time with her, then you'll figure out what to do. A year is enough time to at least know the person and since you two are getting physical then you will know how to work your way from there. I agree with the last poster, if you only want to be exclussive with her just for sex then don't bother using the term "relationship" If your that intimate with her, you can just tell her, she might agree with you since you've been doing each other for a long time.
Let's start off with a question.
After a year, why hasn't your relationship naturally evolved into something more then "friends with benefits?"
It would seem that this is enough time for one of you to realize if the relationship should change. One of you has, why hasn't the other?
Deep down, do you think she is feeling the same? Is she at a point in her life where a more meaningful relationship is what would be beneficial, as opposed to being single?
As mentioned above, you might just feel jealousy at her possibly sleeping with other guys. Do you really want to be with her, or do you just want to know that she isn't sleeping with anyone else?
I'm sure there are many other questions to think about before asking her if she feels the same as you. Think carefully, but don't waste your time waiting around for one of you to make a move in that desired direction.